Have you ever wanted something more, especially when you couldn’t have it? It’s that feeling that is so strong that it commands your attention, and everything else in your mind takes a back seat. It’s like when you’re getting an eye exam and the doctor tells you to hold still and don’t blink as he shines that bright light straight into your eyeball, and the only thing you can think about is how much you want to flap your lids shut for just a second.

Why does this always happen? One answer is that what you focus on grows. In other words, the more you think about something, the more you become consumed by it.

This is just how our brain works, so we might as well use it to our advantage by focusing on what we want.

So the next time you’re at the eye doctor and told not to blink, simply shift your focus. Look beyond that bright light and pretend that you’re looking at a person who you love but won’t see for a long time, and you don’t want to blink and take your eyes off of them.

Do you see the difference? It all depends on the lens through which you choose to look at things.

I remember when our dog became very vocal in her old age, and she’d bark incessantly when she wanted to eat. Those 10 minutes that it took to prepare her food seemed like forever, because she would not shut up until you put her dish down in front of her. However, a few months later, she stopped barking altogether and her health quickly declined. Before we knew it, we had to make the tough decision to put her down. Suddenly, the 10 minutes we had with her after the first shot was given to calm her down felt like nothing. Ten minutes of yapping that felt like forever before was not nearly enough time as we all huddled around her in those final moments in that examining room.

The point is: Start focusing on what you want to experience in your life, instead of keeping your attention on what you don’t want.

Focus on the good, and you’ll see more good. In fact, you will become a magnet for good things.

This new way of thinking will take some practice, and it starts by setting the stage in your mind for the life you want to create. By taking this first step, you will lay the groundwork and open yourself up to an abundance of good things to flow your way!

Here are 3 steps to set the stage in your mind for the life you want to create and to open yourself up to an abundance of good.

• Get present

Get present with where you are, and become aware of the thoughts you are thinking. Take a step back and just observe that inner dialogue that’s on a constant mental loop in your mind.

• Focus

Shift your focus onto what’s working and what’s right, instead of looking at what’s wrong and what’s missing. Start to ask yourself open-ended questions rather than dead-end questions. Asking things like, How can I serve? or What are all the ways I can help others using my passion and talents?, helps to open up the creative pathways in your mind.

• Flip the script

Once you become aware of the negative dialogue that’s happening in the background of your mind, you have the power to flip the script.

Let’s use this example: Say you catch yourself thinking something like, Now what am I going to do? (Which, by the way, is just another way of saying, I’m stuck and I don’t see a way out.) There is an entirely different energy about this question, and the way it’s framed forces your subconscious to pull up all the reasons that support you being stuck.

In a way, you’re asking for clarity but pulling for confusion. Pay attention to the types of questions you ask yourself, and make sure they point towards a solution. That way you can set the stage for what you want to play out. Go there in your mind, see what you want and experience it with all of your senses.

Once you fully believe you can have what you want, the right players, situations and opportunities will present themselves – sometimes right away, and sometimes it may take a little time. The key is to be patient and keep your attention on what you want.

Oftentimes, when we look at what’s happening right now, we get disheartened or frustrated because we think what we’re doing isn’t working.

But that’s not true.

Your present circumstance is simply the effect of your past thinking. Essentially, when you’re looking at what’s in front of you, you’re looking at your past. So shake it off, cut ties with it and look to the horizon. After all, that’s what you want and as soon as you can create it in your mind, it will become part of your reality.